The Jesus Guide to Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a huge issue in the Bible. Jesus alluded to it’s importance on several occasions. He told us that not operating in forgiveness, that is harboring things against people, holding people’s past sins against them will hinder our own faith. One of Jesus most memorable parables is the ’70×7′ parable. Let’s take a look at this subject of forgiveness and getting past the bitterness of offense in our everyday life. We want to demonstrate that forgiveness is not a mechanical formula but is a ‘from the heart lifestyle attitude’ to be exercised without limits.

Matt. 18: 21-35 (ESV)
Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” 22 Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times. 23 “Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. 24 When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. 25 And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. 26 So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ 27 And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. 28 But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay what you owe.’ 29 So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you.’ 30 He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt. 31 When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place. 32 Then his master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33 And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?’ 34 And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. 35 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”

Locator Questions on Forgiveness

  • Is there one particular person who can easily throw you into an emotional turmoil that tears you up on the inside?
  • Do you find that the devil uses one person or a particular situation over and over to steal your peace and joy?
  • Is there a person in your life whom you love but whose insensitivity to your feelings frequently hurts and upsets you?
  • Do you harbor ill feelings toward someone? Do you wish you didn’t feel the way you do about him or her?
  • Are you emotionally paralyzed by what someone has done to you or failed to do for you?
  • Are you free from offense, or are you a prisoner of hurt feelings?
  • Do you allow offense to roll around in your head and emotions until it finally begins to steal your peace and make you upset?
  • Have you tried unsuccessfully to conquer bitterness in prayer?
  • Have you been unable to fully forgive certain people in your life for the offenses that they committed against you? 1
  • If the answer to any of these is yes, then this guide is for you.

The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant

  • Matthew’s gospel, from which our text is taken, is a Jewish gospel meaning the letter was written by a Jew to a Jew.
  • One way that we know that is there is a great amount of unexplained Jewish terminology.
  • You know if you are speaking to a person from another country, you may take extra time in your communication to explain what you are trying to convey. You may take lengths to make sure that you are understood.
  • But if you’re an American and your speaking to your neighbor, you would not even think twice, you just ‘talk’.
  • Well, Matthew, a Jewish believer, just ‘talks’ in this gospel.

Forgiveness as the Foundation of Jewish Life

  • The entire foundation of Jewish life was based on the idea of forgiveness.
  • The Lord presented Himself to Israel as a God of forgiveness.
  • He reminded Israel through the law that they needed it.
  • He made provision in the law that the nation and individual Israelites may acquire it and taught them how to walk in it.
  • Every time an Israelite saw the Tabernacle or saw the Temple, he would be reminded of the concept of forgiveness.
  • Every time he took a whiff of air into his nostrils; that air filled with the smell of burning sacrificial flesh, he would be reminded of the doctrine of forgiveness.
  • Even Jewish bedtime prayers incorporated requests for forgiveness from God as well as prayers forgiving others who had wronged them.
  • These prayers were family rituals in an Israelite home.
  • These prayers were recited nightly alongside the Shema.

The Shema

  • The Shema was a scripture woven prayer based on Deuteronomy 6:4-5.
  • Every Jewish boy prayed the Shema at night before they went to bed.
  • It was also quoted during every synagogue service.
  • Every Jewish person knew the Shema.
  • These verses in Deuteronomy were one of the cornerstone verses of Judaism.

Deuteronomy 6:4-5 (ESV)
4 “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. 5 You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.

  •  Shema is Hebrew for ‘hear’ the first word of Deut. 6:4
  • “The word Shema” became a designation for the entire commandment
  • Rabbi’s taught that if you quoted the Shema twice a day, morning and evening, you would fulfill Joshua 1:8

Joshua 1:8 (ESV)
8 This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success.

  • And so, Jewish families would pray the Shema at night interweaving it with requests for forgiveness.
  • Look at Jesus disciples who approached Him on the subject of prayer.

Luke 11:1–4 (ESV) 
1 Now Jesus was praying in a certain place, and when he finished, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray, as John taught his disciples.” 2 And he said to them, “When you pray, say: “Father, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come. 3 Give us each day our daily bread, 4 and forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation.”

  • You see Jesus wove forgiveness into His teaching on prayer.
  • He knew who He was talking to. He knew His audience was Jewish.
  • Here it is again in Mark 11, a set of verses you are certainly familiar with.

Mark 11:22–25 (ESV)
22 And Jesus answered them, “Have faith in God. 23 Truly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him. 24 Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. 25 And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”

  • The point is ‘forgiveness was woven into the pattern of Jewish life’.
  • Now notice this faith connection to forgiveness that Jesus attests to.
  • It indicates that forgiveness is an important subject, if for no other reason, that the Bible teaches that your faith is hindered if you are not walking in it.
  • And you never want to be in any place spiritually where you cannot believe Him.

Hebrews 11:6 (NKJV)
6 But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

  • Unforgiveness prevents you from coming to Him.
  • Getting rid of the unforgiveness is a priority so that we can ‘come to Him’, that is enjoy His Presence!
  • Now through all of these verses, would it not be safe to assume that Israel had ‘forgiveness on the brain’.
  • But there concept of forgiveness was off course.
  • There were limits to the idea of forgiveness amongst the Israelites.
  • The Jews imposed boundaries to the notion of forgiveness.
  • This notion was recorded in the Talmud.
  • For those of you that were not here, the following background was given.
  • BACKGROUND: The Mishnah was the Torah [1st 5 books of the Old Testament] plus the oral law. Commentaries were written by the Jews on the Mishnah. Those commentaries were called the Gemara. Combined together [the Mishnah and the Gemara] as a set these Jewish writings were called the Talmud.
  • These Jewish limits of forgiveness came from the teachings of the Rabbi’s.
  • Rabbi’s taught that there was a limit of three occurrences in which an individual could sin against another person, ask for forgiveness from them, and receive it.
  • Here is a reference in the Talmud…

Yoma 86b “It was taught: R. Jose b. Judah said: “If a man commits a transgression, the first, second and third time he is forgiven, the fourth time he is not forgiven, as it is said: ‘Thus says the Lord. For three transgressions of Israel, Yea for four, I will not reverse it’”

  • The scripture this Rabbi is referring to is found in Amos chapter 1.

Amos 1:3 (ESV)
3 Thus says the LORD: “For three transgressions of Damascus, and for four, I will not revoke the punishment, because they have threshed Gilead with threshing sledges of iron.Rabbi’s said that the number of times a person could be forgiven for the same transgression is 3.

  • Three is pretty generous wouldn’t you think?
  • QUESTION: If someone committed identity theft fraud against you, and they did it not just once but three times in a row; and then asked you for forgiveness three times in a row, wouldn’t you think being forgiven each time for this offense was a generous amount?
  • Wouldn’t that seem to us as pretty good spirituality?
  • You have to bring this down in a real way to yourself in order to understand it.
  • Pick a sin you particularly loathe and get it down to family, where emotions are particularly sensitive and where depth of feeling runs deep, and ask yourself if this family member commits this sin that I loathe against me and they do it three times in a row, the same sin three times in a row, would you think the Rabbi’s had their teaching correct?
  • The question boils down to this, “What is your limit of forgiveness? How far will you go? Where do you draw the line?”
  • The Rabbi’s understood baseball, because that is what they taught, the three strike rule!
  • Three strikes and you are out.
  • Now, you know, that many of you would be sorely tempted and may not even make it to three strikes.
  • You would throw your hands up after the first strike, after the first offense!!!
  • So with all this background in mind, let’s look at this exchange between Peter and Jesus.
  • Peter asks Jesus a question because that was the way it was done in that day.

Matthew 18:21 (ESV)
21 Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?”

  • Peter up’s the ante to seven times.
  • He up’s it from three strikes to seven strikes.
  • Peter, was expecting a good commendation from Jesus for doubling the Jewish forgiveness requirement.
  • His thought is to go the extra mile to double up on it.
  • You know seven is God’s number, maybe Peter was trying to be super spiritual by forgiving someone seven times.
  • That has to be magnanimous.
  • How many times have we thought, ‘Boy I am really going to do something for God here.’
  • Instead, Peter is shocked by Jesus answer.

Matthew 18:22 (ESV)
22 Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven.

  • In this passage in Matthew 18, Jesus wants you to know 3 things about forgiveness:

Forgiveness Has No Limits

  • Seventy times seven does not mean 490 times.
  • The phrase is what is called a hyperbole.
  • DEFINITION: hyperbole – an extravagant exaggeration.
  • Jesus states unequivocally that real truth of forgiveness is that it is meant to be unlimited.
  • Now take this truth and now look at the previous statement about ‘picking a sin that you particular loathe’ many times past the seven times that Peter offered up.
  • True love and forgiveness has no end.
  • It has no limits.
  • And really you want this.
  • Your spirit wants it to be that way!
  • Because you know that God will never ask you to do something that He Himself will not do.
  • You want God to be unlimited in forgiving you.
  • O, man do you want that!
  • Your heart wants the standard to be, ‘God, forgive and keep on forgiving’.
  • “Yes, but I am tired of what they are doing to me”, you may say.
  • You may be very well tired of it, no doubt about it, you may be foaming at the gills, BUT maintain the standard ‘forgive and keep on forgiving’.

ILLUSTRATION: A Forgiveness Story
On February 9, 1960, Adolph Coors III was kidnapped and held for ransom. Seven months later his body was found on a remote hillside. He had been shot to death. Adolph Coors IV, then fifteen years old, lost not only his father but his best friend. For years young Coors hated Joseph Corbett, the man who was sentenced to life for the slaying.
Then in 1975 Adolph Coors became a Christian. He was born again. He got out of the family beer business, but he could not get out of the hatred that he had for his father’s killer.
Resentment brewed within him and stunted his spiritual growth. He cried out to God for help because he realized how his hatred for Corbett was alienating him from God and other people. The day finally came that he was able to go to the maximum security unit of Colorado’s Canon City penitentiary. He tried to talk with Corbett. Corbett refused to see him. Coors left a Bible inscribed with this message: I’m here to see you today and I’m sorry that we could not meet. As a Christian I am summoned by our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, to forgive. I do forgive you, and I ask you to forgive me for the hatred I’ve held in my heart for you.” Later Coors confessed, “I have a love for that man that only Jesus Christ could have put in my heart.”

  • Here is the good news!
  • The extravagant exaggeration of forgiveness requirement has to be possible for you to accomplish because God will never ask you to do something that is beyond your ability.
  • That would be unfair of Him to ask you to do something that you were incapable of pulling off.
  • You have been born again, and the love of God has been shed abroad in your heart, and that love in you has this extravagance about it in this area of forgiveness.
  • Love without boundaries:
  • Forgiveness without limits:
  • This is the power and the commandment of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
  • Now, forgiveness is not only without limits, it is also not according to formula.
  • Acceptable forgiveness is not counting a person’s transgressions against you up to the number seven and then on the eight time, we can be unforgiving.
  • Counting is legalism and not the spirit of love found in the New Covenant.
  • We should be glad that Jesus said this in this way.
  • The bottom line is if you are keeping score at all, you missed the whole point.
  • Why? The standard, the measure that we are to use is beyond your ability to count.
  • If a person sins against you 490 times in a day, forgive him every time.
  • Jesus then gives a parable to illustrate the idea of unlimited love.

Matthew 18:23-24 (ESV)
23 “Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. 24 When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents.

  • Here is the second thing we are to see about forgiveness.

Forgiveness Has a High Standard

  • The standard is 10,000 talents owed!
  • Jesus relates a parable of a man that owes 10,000 talents and is forgiven the debt.
  • Talents were a denomination of money used in the 1st century they are not gifts and abilities as we know the word today.
  • How much money is 10,000 talents anyway?
  • Here is the calculation, 10,000 talents is roughly…
  • 1 talent = 6000 denarius
  • 1 denarius is a day’s wage
  • Using $80.00 per day as an average U.S. wage.
  • The Total = 4.8 trillion dollars!!!
  • 4.8 trillion dollars was more money than the Roman government had!
  • It is more money than many countries national debt!
  • Jesus is saying, “If your brother sins a 10,000 talent sin against you, forgive him.”
  • In the first point, Jesus tells us how long we are to forgive, 490 times; the answer translates to forever and ever or unlimited.
  • And here in this second point, He tells us ‘How much we are to forgive.’
  • How big a sin, committed against us, should we forgive?
  • Is there a limit to how many times we are to forgive?
  • Is there a limit to how a big sin we are to forgive?
  • Jesus gives us no place to draw a line.
  • No place to say, ‘This is how far I will go and that is it.’
  • The last of the three points is this…

Forgiveness Is from the Heart

Matthew 18:23-24 (ESV)
35 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”

  • Spiritual life is meant to be lived from the inside out
  • You serve God with your spirit – Rom. 1:9

Romans 1:9 (ESV)
9 For God is my witness, whom I serve with my spirit in the gospel of his Son, that without ceasing I mention you

  • Walking in love by operating in forgiveness is done from the heart, not your head.
  • It is your head, your soul that will give you all kinds of problems with how long and how much you forgive.
  • You have to fight images, and thoughts and all kinds of head traffic.
  • It is the spirit that gives life, the flesh doesn’t get the job done.

John 6:63 (ESV)
63 It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life.

Call to Action:

Get it settled in your heart and then fight the good fight of faith against your head. Cast down imaginations. Cast down reasoning’s. Knowing that you have forgiven from the heart becomes a weapon. It becomes a weapon against thoughts of unforgiveness that come into your head. It becomes a force against the mental pictures that tempt you to relive the wrong you’ve experienced.

Question: Do you have a life changing ‘forgiveness’ story that you are comfortable sharing? Would you please leave it in the comments section below?

__________

References

  1. Renner, Rick. 2002, You Can Get Over It, How to Confront, Forgive, and Move On. Tulsa, OK.: Teach All Nations